Which Web indexer are you?

There are many reasons to use PeARS and start indexing the Web. But what is yours? Read the following profiles, and discover which Web indexer you are. Then... go and create those pods!

The librarian The indexer by excellence. You worry days and nights about those billions of Web pages that sit uncatalogued on dubious servers. Who knows what is really there? How many cute cat pages? How many pages on 18th century hairstyles? And which ones would you recommend? The pile of knowledge is growing every day, and it is completely out of control.

The altruist You're at your happiest doing things for others. You come up with random anniversaries just so that you can celebrate your friends. This indexing thing is just a pretext to do good things, and perhaps expand your usual range of gifts. You're going to make a botany pod for Uncle Bob and a Harley-Davidson pod for Cousin Aisha.

The player You think it's all a game, and you're sure gonna win. The other guy is making a Star Trek pod? Your Star Trek pod will be better and bigger. The other team is indexing beetles? Your guys will index beetles and moths. And you're counting. Real-time counting. Oh yeah.

The aesthete You really don't care about the Web. But you do care about beauty and you can nearly visualise what it would mean for millions of people to choreographically grasp a handful of websites and throw them at each other in slow motion, like a giant, intricate flower opening up. You long for the silent apotheosis of revolutions and the inevitable void that lies beyond.

The responsible adult Those little devils are supposed to browse the Web for their school project, but they will inevitably end up on some Pokemon websites. If only you can make them stay on that French Revolution pod for the next hour, things will turn out okay. (Good luck.)

The prepper You have recently bought land in New Zealand, built a bunker, and now need a copy of the entire Web to sustain you while the atomic cloud slowly subsides. You like the idea of getting together with other preppers to index prepping websites and websites about indexing prepping websites. Because you can never be too prepared.

The odd one out Fate forgot to make you a beautifully average human being, so the Internet doesn't like you. You like curling, you get football; you like curly, you get straight hair; you like gloomy, you get puppies. If only you had a safe bubble of Web, made to your image...

The marxist A socialist revolution is inevitable, so you might as well start now. You know too well that storming the Winter Palace won't suffice, so you're off to expropriate some more important expropriators and put server farms back in the hands of your comrades. Well, maybe not farms. More like, scythes and sickles.

The libertarian The Web restricts your personal autonomy, big time. Only today, you searched for 'famous anarchists' and Peter Kropotkin came before Emma Goldman on the results' page. You'd of course totally done it the other way round. You want to get those search algorithms into your hands and do it your way.

The galactic emperor You first name is Darth. You really don't like the idea that knowledge might be owned by the people. You have already designed a plan to make better pods, with more power and more glitter, and a backdoor that lets you control them at a distance. Your pods will be called TeARS and have cute in-built smileys that do not smile. You will say you always loved decentralisation and it was all your idea in the first place. You might turn out to be useful.